jokes bad or otherwise.

[George]

Energizer Bunny Arrested! Charged with battery.

 

[George]

Don't get married. Find a woman you hate and buy her a house. It's a lot easier on you.

 

[George]

I want to die peacefully, in my sleep, like my grandfather, not screaming, terrified, like his passengers.

 

[George]

Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms!

 

[George]

Q:Who was the last person to box Rocky Marciano?
A:His undertaker

 

[George]

Hypochondria is the only disease I haven't got.

 

[maltrab]

Oh I think I have had that,let me know your symptoms just in case

 

[George]

How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise MY hand!

 

[George]

Jesus loves you! It's everybody else that thinks you're a pillock!

 

[George]

Is reading in the bathroom considered multi-tasking?

 

[George]

For sale: parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.

 

[George]

Q: How do you embarrass an archaeologist? A: Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from. sorry

 

[George]

Q:What did the fisherman say to the magician?
A:'Pick a cod, any cod.'

 

[maltrab]

We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public

 

[maltrab]

Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

 

[maltrab]

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing

 

[maltrab]

A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don't need it

 

[maltrab]

The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas!

 

[maltrab]

A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."

 

[George]

Help Wanted: Telepath. You know where to apply.