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And talking of scones and for all you lovers of one of the finest comedy series EVER !!!!...."STILL GAME".....remember Tam.....he won the competition with the immortal phrase....."SSSSCONE".....which is Glaswegian for "IT'S GONE".....remember Jack and Victor's faces when they realised it was...

Gothic !!!!...you have morphed into the "man with steel fingers" !!!......you sound like our favourite silent killer !!!!....did you have a "GILLIAN" at the Leek camp like Foggy did at Catterick ????????? X!

EVERYONE knows the reason the cafe opened late !!!!.....it was because Sid always offered to do "the late" shift solo....this enabled him to smuggle in his "friend" THE BUS CONDUCTRESS !!!!........ His only worry was that next morning Ivy would be inspecting all the sandwiches... the pies and...

Amos....if you pick the the Vanilla Slice you will be getting it in a BAG NOT A BOX!!!!.... because where do you think you are ?????....HARRODS !!!!!...whereas if you pick the Eclair you are guaranteed a biiiiiiig hug off Glenda......just don't call her "BRENDA" !!! or you might be wearing it...

Barry..The Brazen Head is in the Gorbals area of Glasgow.....it is STAUNCH Republican and is known as the most famous Celtic bar in the world !!!. It is an amazing place.....but very pro Irish.....anti British. A lot of people from my City say "Scouse not English".....and Scousers seem to be...

Barry...I have been bevvying down the Gallowgate and the Barras in Glasgow and the pubs have had the Republic of Ireland games on instead of Scotland games. The same goes for Bridgeton in Glasgow where they will watch England games instead of Scotland games....a staunch Rangers area. X!

Now yer talkin' Ferret !!!!!...I was always half Celtic half Everton bobble hat !!!!....[although we also had half Rangers half Everton bobbles as well !!!]..Everton were always considered the Catholic club in the City....and I am of that persuasion.....infact when we won the Cup Winners Cup in...

Captain...SHE ABSOLUTELY LOVES OUR SHOW !!!!....it is the only thing that keeps us together !!!!!!.....the only reason I don't divorce her is to make sure she is unhappy !!!!. Seriously.....we watch it together......she is [nearly] as obsessed as I am !!!!......infact she bears a striking...

Captain !!!!.....regarding Mrs.Blue....any excuse to leave home is good enough for me !!!...she was so ugly as a child she had FROSTED GLASS IN HER INCUBATOR !!!!!.. Luckily for me [or maybe unlucky for me] she is a "MOODYBLUE" as well..... so she she understands my urge to travel to a match...

I did indeed Mr.Ferret.......and just to confuse our "non football" Summerwine family members.....the flag bears the crests of BOTH EVERTON AND RANGERS !!!... Now here is where it gets a little complicated for our worldwide family......RANGERS ARE A TEAM FROM GLASCOW....SCOTLAND !!!...[I can see...

Good morning everyone...or should I say "Guten Morgen !!!".......just a little message from your Scouse roving reporter.....having just returned from Germany..... As I stated in my previous posts.......any trouble is caused by a very very tiny minority.....I witnessed approximately 65000 England...

Captain !!!!...talking of the wonderful Cisse and Ada let's not forget the equally wonderful Billy Connolly and Kenny Everett !!!......there were so funny and you could see they just loved working together......they would be laughing as they said their lines...only to be drowned out by...

Daisy..."it's not grounds for divorce being married to a Liverpool fan !!!!" Onslow "ARE YOU SURE ??????!!!!!"....I AM 100% BEHIND HIM ONN THAT ONE !!!!!!. X!

GIVE IT TO EVERTON.....SO THEY OWE A LITLLE BIT LESS.......OH...AND A FACE TRANSPLANT !!!!!. X!

The co star in on of my favourite music videos......Kate Bush's Dad in the amazingly good epic........ "CLOUDBUSTING". The video is absolutely brilliant !!!!.......and Donald was his usual exceptional self........have a watch and see if you agree. X!

The problem is we will be going round in circles for ever my Cornish friend... It is estimated that throughout the U.K. that there is approximately 2 million people who watch "their side" every week......there are those [a small minority] who seek to confront other supporters with the same...

I always find it funny when people have such a dislike for our national game...... I know and understand about the "overpaid prima donnas" argument but it brings such joy and happiness to so many people......from supporters of Premier league teams [like me and The Captain] to fans of clubs who...

The original "Bryant and May" factory used to be in Garston,Liverpool......it employed hundreds of local women and men....but unfortunately......to people not working on the site the smell of Sulphur was unbearable !!!... but the people who worked there they were so used to the smell they...

She beat him at darts,dominos and arm wresting...and he never even had the opportunity of a rematch !!!!.....every time I see Smiler I always think about the time in the cafe when he bought the lads 3 sticky buns.....and then proceeded to tell them about the conversation he and his wife had in...

I will reitterate this tale......simply because it is a "claim to fame [ish]" point !! [ish !!!]!... Although I am from Liverpool I had a friend who was from Balby in Doncaster who supported Everton...... He invited me to his house to stay the night before we played Leeds at Elland Road.......I...