84

Peripheral

Peripheral

Dedicated Member
Tomorrow, if I last that long, I will be 84. I want to do something special for the occasion so I decided to go onto the street and take 84 steps. I plan on doing this every day until I reach the age of 100. I got this idea from the inspiration instilled into me, {Instilled, isn't that something to do with making beer?} where was I? Oh yes, an idea I got from watching that wonderful gentleman, Captain Tom Moore, on TV. I thought that if I took 84 steps every day then by the time I was a hundred I would be outside my son's house in Australia. That is just an idea I am contemplating but, in the meantime, may I request that all cheques you send, be sent to Captain Tom Moore except those over £1,000. Please send those to me direct at the Poor House, Hardup Alley, Skintsville, where I can assure you that they will be given such wonderful care.
Have a Nice Day.
Peri.
 
Many happy returns Peri, Pearl will supply the cake, Tony a Cornish jig, John a drop of Guinness and Dick the dancing girls, me well I am just their agent
 
Happy Birthday Peri , purveyor of tall tales and short stories, comedic raconteur and twice voted Rotherham champion Curd Tart scoffer 1965-1966 when an unprecedented shortage of Curd prevented him defending his crown . Have a great day Man, hope Joey's present isn't too cheep sorry cheap and Mrs P gives you a nice cake as a replacement for earache :):17:
 
Hi, many thanks for your birthday wishes. I suppose you want to know how I spent the day. That word, 'spent', gives me the shakes. I'm more of a collector than a spender. Auntie Wainwright supporter. Now, how did I spend my day? Well, I snoozed for part of the morning then I prepared for my present from me to me. I planned to go out through the front door, after opening it first I hasten to add, then walk along by the front window. That is a massive distance of fourteen feet, quite a distance for me because I only have two feet. I pulled my shoes out, by means of a grabber from under the cupboard, and set them by my feet. I got my left shoe on, with the aid of a 2' 6" shoe lift then tried to ease my right foot into the other shoe. That is when my birthday plans went asunder. I could not get my right shoe on. "Oh dear", I said to myself, or words to that effect, "bang goes my birthday present from me to me".
I suppose that really, I was lucky in having to cancel my twelve-foot walk because had I got out, I would have needed a SAT NAV to find my way back. Undaunted, I walked from the living room to the kitchen window four times and waved to a centipede that was crawling up the greenhouse. It waved back to me but, being a centipede, it was taking forever. I sat down and counted my blessings. How many members do we have in this group? Well, I consider you are all my friends and wish you well. One more thing before I go back to talk to the centipede, this is my fourth 21st birthday, 4 x 21= 84. I wonder if I'll reach another 21st birthday.
Peri.
 
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