Good day.

[Peripheral]

Good day fellow earthlings.....Mmm, somehow that doesn't sound like an appropriate greeting. Earthlings, makes us sound like something that has just crawled out of the garden. Then again, when I look in the mirror I do look like something that has just crawled out of the garden, well, at least pulled through a hedge backwards. That's me, a bit of a slob. On my last birthday, I was stood at the gate when a neighbour walked by.
"My birthday today," I told him.
"Happy Birthday," he said, "have you got a telegram from the Queen?"
Cheeky devil, I thought, I'm only thirty-three. Okay, 83, but I don't look a hundred. He smiled as he went on his way, and trod in a pile of dog's doo dah.
"OH YUCK," he shouted.
"I just did that," I said looking down at my shoe whilst trying to scrape the residue off onto the pavement.
"Well do it in your toilet next time," he growled.
Sorry, I went off at a tangent there. Tangent, sounds like a fella who has just been abroad for a holiday. I just wanted to wish you all a nice day and hope that you have plenty of smiles to make it all worthwhile.
Peri.

 

[captain clutterbuck]

trod in a pile of dog's doo

Could be worse

"I just did that,"

It could have been a lot more unpleasant . It could have been a horse's "deposit" but I suppose you would have been out scraping it into a bucket to put on your garden or making your worst enemy a horses@%t sandwich . You could have also done the deed whilst in the guise of a farm animal practising , as is your won't , for next years appearance is Jack in the Beanstalk where you are to revive your role as the back end of Horatio the Pantomime Horse , coconut shells to the ready

 

[Adanor]

Well let's look at the positive side of this situation. If a dog couldn't poop, then he would be in a whole heap of trouble, and will end up at the vet's who will look intently at the back end, maybe even doing a rectal on the dog. Very unpleasant but necessary.