Peripheral
Dedicated Member
Today, according to the weather forecasters is going to be a 'hot 'un'. I am not a fan of hot weather so I am taking precautions to ensure that I keep cool. I will leave the freezer door open and sit in front of it in a deck chair. I will be surrounded by fans, the electric kind, not the ladies from the Darby and Joan club and my underpants will be have a series of holes cut in them to maintain the flow of air. My hair will be encrusted with sugar and hundreds of flies will be released into the room which will, hopefully, with their flapping wings, keep my head cool. Finally, I will fill my wife's bra full of ice cubes and wear that. Believe me they will hold copious amounts of ice. One lives in hopes that the Titanic does not come down the street. If anyone else has any ideas of keeping cool I would be delighted to hear of them. 
