A pig walks into a bar and drinks 10 pints, as he's about to leave
the barman stops him
and says "Dont you need the toilet",
"Nah", says the pig, "I go wee wee wee all the way home.
Fat wife fell down the stairs. She went into the living room asked her husband 'Didn't you hear me fall down the stairs?' husband replied 'Sorry I thought it was the start of Eastenders'.
I gave my mate a Paracetamol. He said, "What's that for?"
I said, "To put in your pint."
"And why would I do that?" he replied.
I said, "Well, you've been nursing it for over an hour, I just assumed
it was ill."
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