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barmpot
LOTSW Fanatic
AN AFTER-HOLIDAY POEM
'Twas the month after Christmas, and all through the house
nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.
The cookies I'd nibbled, the eggnog I'd taste
At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.
When I got on the scales there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber).
I'd remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared;
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared,
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese
And the way I'd never said, 'No thank you, please.’
As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt -
I said to myself, as I only can
'You can't spend a winter disguised as a man!’
So - away with the last of the sour cream dip,
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip
Every last bit of food that I like must be banished
'Till all the additional ounces have vanished.
I won't have a cookie - not even a lick.
I'll only chew on a long celery stick.
I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie,
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.
I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore.
But isn't that what January is for?
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.
Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet!
'Twas the month after Christmas, and all through the house
nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.
The cookies I'd nibbled, the eggnog I'd taste
At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.
When I got on the scales there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber).
I'd remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared;
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared,
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese
And the way I'd never said, 'No thank you, please.’
As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt -
I said to myself, as I only can
'You can't spend a winter disguised as a man!’
So - away with the last of the sour cream dip,
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip
Every last bit of food that I like must be banished
'Till all the additional ounces have vanished.
I won't have a cookie - not even a lick.
I'll only chew on a long celery stick.
I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie,
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.
I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore.
But isn't that what January is for?
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.
Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet!
Adanor
Dedicated Member
If you're on an airplane, pray that you do have an exceptional pilot. Many pilots are only trained to fly an airplane under normal conditions with the assistance of the computer. If anything out of the ordinary happens, they're clueless. Not too many military pilots who know how to fly by the seat of their pants are around.
Brian Johns
Dedicated Member
Old pilot adages
"I would rather be down here wishing I was up there, than up there wishing I was down here!"
"If you suffer engine failure in a twin engine plane, the second engine will take you to the scene of the crash" (and you will beat ALL the emergency services to the crash site)
"There are OLD pilots and BOLD pilots but there are no OLD BOLD pilots"
"Two things are useless in an emergency...the runway behind you and the sky above you!"
Adanor as a pilot myself I have to take umbrage (without offence
) at your last post on several points. ALL pilots are trained to fly under NON normal conditions, in fact once you learn the basics of flying, the greater majority of the training is on how to fly when things go wrong!
When training you are hit with emergency scenarios on almost every training flight, from engine failures to stalls to missed landings, instrument failure, hydraulic failures, radio failures etc etc. and that is just on the small aircraft you START training on.
Unlike driving a car where, once you get a licence you can drive basically ANY car, in aircraft you have to be "endorsed" (i.e. fully trained) on EACH aircraft type you fly. While BASIC flying is the same regardless of aircraft, each type of aircraft has it's own systems you have to learn, stall characteristics change from aircraft to aircraft, speeds required for different maneuvers are different, engine and fuel systems are different and so on. So if you learn to fly on say a Cessna 152 and want to fly a Cessna 172, or a Piper Cherokee or ANY other type of aircraft, you have to be given instruction and FLY with an instructor in it and PASS the endorsement BEFORE you can fly it.
Similarly you need endorsements for things such as Multi engines, retractable undercarriage, constant speed propellers, tail wheels, Instrument ratings, Jet engines and so ad infinitum! You also have to maintain "currency" (ie fly regularly) to keep your licence. Private pilots have to pass a practical test every 2 years, Commercial Pilots every year and Senior Commercial (Airline Pilot) every SIX months. That is just LEGAL requirement. On top of that Airline companies have their own training and currency requirements. Not forgetting the MEDICAL requirements and testing done!
I can vividly recall flying by myself just after qualifying and wondering what was wrong....everything was so EASY, nothing was going wrong. I was used to having engine failures, gear failure, navigational changes, emergency landings and so on, on basically EVERY flight I took as a student that when I started flying in the "real" world when things rarely go wrong I was SURE that something wasn't right!
MILITARY pilots are usually trained to an even HIGHER standard AND usually have more flight experience. When they leave the military, airlines are keen to snap them up for that very reason.
For commercial jet flying "seat of the pants" cannot and does not come into play. The systems and sheer size of the aircraft make that almost impossible even IF the pilot wanted to fly it that way. ANY pilot who just flies "by the seat of his pants" is one I DON'T want to be with, regardless of what type of aircraft he flies. Small aircraft do "involve" the pilot more in the real flight experience as you are physically in touch with all the controls and flight control surfaces and you can "throw them around" a bit, even the "throwing around" is controlled although to the uninitiated it may not appear so.
The increase in complexity of the modern jet airliner means that computer control is essential, this does NOT mean a pilot is not trained to handle emergencies. As an aside, contrary to some belief, a co-pilot is NOT just a trainee pilot. They are fully trained pilots in their own right AND fully qualified to fly the aircraft. In fact they quite often DO fly the aircraft as Pilots and co-pilots on airlines regularly take turn about flying on different legs of the flight, including take-off and landing! They are usually less experienced than the Captain that is all, it doesn't mean they are less qualified! ALL Captains were co-pilots once!
I have heard non-pilots talking about how "good" a particular person is at flying an aircraft because they did "this" or "that" and thought to myself "I ain't flying with THAT guy!!"
By the same token I have heard stories of how "bad" a pilot was because he did such and such, which in fact was TOTALLY correct!
This was brought home to me in dramatic fashion one day when I was landing at a bush strip with a first timer on board in the back seat. (NOTE: This was fairly rare for me as I was with the Air Wing where everyone in it was either a pilot of some description, or experienced as a passenger). On this particular day there was a moderate cross wind across the strip, but nothing out of the ordinary. So there was I, Fat dumb and happy cruising in for what to me was a normal landing, when about 200ft up I get a tap on the shoulder and my VERY pale passenger was asking if I ALWAYS landed sideways??
For the uninitiated, landing (especially in a small aircraft) in a cross wind involves flying at an angle with the nose pointed to some degree in the direction from which the wind is coming. So although the aircraft is flying straight to the runway it is actually pointing at an angle to it. (called "crabbing") From the aircraft you can get the impression that you are flying sideways. The trick is, just on touchdown, as you flare the aircraft you "kick" the rudder to straighten the plane and also drop the upwind wing to compensate for drift. (Large aircraft also "fly sideways" but they have crosswind undercarriage which involves a slightly different technique as they flare and touch down)
Now this was all VERY ordinary run of the mill stuff to me and usually to my passengers however to this new guy I was some nut case trying to kill him by showing off flying sideways!!
Moral to the story (well ONE of them) Do not take the opinion of someone as gospel if they are not qualified to make it. Listen by all means but temper judgment with knowledge.
OK
Here endeth the lesson for today!
Sorrrrrrrry pet hobbyhorse
"I would rather be down here wishing I was up there, than up there wishing I was down here!"
"If you suffer engine failure in a twin engine plane, the second engine will take you to the scene of the crash" (and you will beat ALL the emergency services to the crash site)
"There are OLD pilots and BOLD pilots but there are no OLD BOLD pilots"
"Two things are useless in an emergency...the runway behind you and the sky above you!"
Adanor as a pilot myself I have to take umbrage (without offence
) at your last post on several points. ALL pilots are trained to fly under NON normal conditions, in fact once you learn the basics of flying, the greater majority of the training is on how to fly when things go wrong!When training you are hit with emergency scenarios on almost every training flight, from engine failures to stalls to missed landings, instrument failure, hydraulic failures, radio failures etc etc. and that is just on the small aircraft you START training on.
Unlike driving a car where, once you get a licence you can drive basically ANY car, in aircraft you have to be "endorsed" (i.e. fully trained) on EACH aircraft type you fly. While BASIC flying is the same regardless of aircraft, each type of aircraft has it's own systems you have to learn, stall characteristics change from aircraft to aircraft, speeds required for different maneuvers are different, engine and fuel systems are different and so on. So if you learn to fly on say a Cessna 152 and want to fly a Cessna 172, or a Piper Cherokee or ANY other type of aircraft, you have to be given instruction and FLY with an instructor in it and PASS the endorsement BEFORE you can fly it.
Similarly you need endorsements for things such as Multi engines, retractable undercarriage, constant speed propellers, tail wheels, Instrument ratings, Jet engines and so ad infinitum! You also have to maintain "currency" (ie fly regularly) to keep your licence. Private pilots have to pass a practical test every 2 years, Commercial Pilots every year and Senior Commercial (Airline Pilot) every SIX months. That is just LEGAL requirement. On top of that Airline companies have their own training and currency requirements. Not forgetting the MEDICAL requirements and testing done!
I can vividly recall flying by myself just after qualifying and wondering what was wrong....everything was so EASY, nothing was going wrong. I was used to having engine failures, gear failure, navigational changes, emergency landings and so on, on basically EVERY flight I took as a student that when I started flying in the "real" world when things rarely go wrong I was SURE that something wasn't right!
MILITARY pilots are usually trained to an even HIGHER standard AND usually have more flight experience. When they leave the military, airlines are keen to snap them up for that very reason.
For commercial jet flying "seat of the pants" cannot and does not come into play. The systems and sheer size of the aircraft make that almost impossible even IF the pilot wanted to fly it that way. ANY pilot who just flies "by the seat of his pants" is one I DON'T want to be with, regardless of what type of aircraft he flies. Small aircraft do "involve" the pilot more in the real flight experience as you are physically in touch with all the controls and flight control surfaces and you can "throw them around" a bit, even the "throwing around" is controlled although to the uninitiated it may not appear so.
The increase in complexity of the modern jet airliner means that computer control is essential, this does NOT mean a pilot is not trained to handle emergencies. As an aside, contrary to some belief, a co-pilot is NOT just a trainee pilot. They are fully trained pilots in their own right AND fully qualified to fly the aircraft. In fact they quite often DO fly the aircraft as Pilots and co-pilots on airlines regularly take turn about flying on different legs of the flight, including take-off and landing! They are usually less experienced than the Captain that is all, it doesn't mean they are less qualified! ALL Captains were co-pilots once!
I have heard non-pilots talking about how "good" a particular person is at flying an aircraft because they did "this" or "that" and thought to myself "I ain't flying with THAT guy!!"
By the same token I have heard stories of how "bad" a pilot was because he did such and such, which in fact was TOTALLY correct!
This was brought home to me in dramatic fashion one day when I was landing at a bush strip with a first timer on board in the back seat. (NOTE: This was fairly rare for me as I was with the Air Wing where everyone in it was either a pilot of some description, or experienced as a passenger). On this particular day there was a moderate cross wind across the strip, but nothing out of the ordinary. So there was I, Fat dumb and happy cruising in for what to me was a normal landing, when about 200ft up I get a tap on the shoulder and my VERY pale passenger was asking if I ALWAYS landed sideways??
For the uninitiated, landing (especially in a small aircraft) in a cross wind involves flying at an angle with the nose pointed to some degree in the direction from which the wind is coming. So although the aircraft is flying straight to the runway it is actually pointing at an angle to it. (called "crabbing") From the aircraft you can get the impression that you are flying sideways. The trick is, just on touchdown, as you flare the aircraft you "kick" the rudder to straighten the plane and also drop the upwind wing to compensate for drift. (Large aircraft also "fly sideways" but they have crosswind undercarriage which involves a slightly different technique as they flare and touch down)
Now this was all VERY ordinary run of the mill stuff to me and usually to my passengers however to this new guy I was some nut case trying to kill him by showing off flying sideways!!
Moral to the story (well ONE of them) Do not take the opinion of someone as gospel if they are not qualified to make it. Listen by all means but temper judgment with knowledge.
OK
Here endeth the lesson for today!
Sorrrrrrrry pet hobbyhorse
me2
Dedicated Member
Thanks for that wonderful overview of flying. I wonder if Adanor heard the same news story I heard. I didn't listen closely but they were talking about something happening that would wipe out all Cell Phone, ATM's, etc. They said it would affect airplanes too as they would have no contact with the ground and would have to fly without instrumentation. They implied most pilots wouldn't know how to fly in those conditions. Just another case of our news media not doing a good job reporting the news.
Brian Johns
Dedicated Member
I am not sure what news report you are referring to as I haven't seen it, but it sounds like something that would affect wi-fi type equipment. I assume the report was making some sort of connection between something that would do that and the control systems on a modern airliner which these days are mainly "fly by wire" i.e. no physical connection between the actual controls the pilot handles and the control surfaces themselves.
Whether this connection between the two items is valid or not I cannot say (no knowledge base) however if something were to destroy the fly by wire systems AND the backups then it would make little difference if the pilot knew how to fly or not. There would be no way to control the aircraft. I do not know enough about modern airline control properties to say if it would be possible or not however.
Flying simply without contact with the ground eg..no radio, while dangerous given the amount of aircraft these days is NOT impossible AND is part of EVERY pilot's training! There are procedures in place to be followed if this loss of contact occurs.
Whether this connection between the two items is valid or not I cannot say (no knowledge base) however if something were to destroy the fly by wire systems AND the backups then it would make little difference if the pilot knew how to fly or not. There would be no way to control the aircraft. I do not know enough about modern airline control properties to say if it would be possible or not however.
Flying simply without contact with the ground eg..no radio, while dangerous given the amount of aircraft these days is NOT impossible AND is part of EVERY pilot's training! There are procedures in place to be followed if this loss of contact occurs.
Brian Johns
Dedicated Member
On further consideration, the report could be something to do with an EMP pulse, which wipes out electrical systems (you get one following a nuclear explosion for example which is why military tech is "hardened" against such things)
The loss of all electrical systems on an airliner WOULD be a major problem and how much the pilot could do would depend on a number of circumstances such as what type of aircraft he was flying, what systems were affected etc.
Basically it would be "luck of the draw" as to what was physically possible....Pilot training however, while a factor, would not necessarily be the biggest problem!
The loss of all electrical systems on an airliner WOULD be a major problem and how much the pilot could do would depend on a number of circumstances such as what type of aircraft he was flying, what systems were affected etc.
Basically it would be "luck of the draw" as to what was physically possible....Pilot training however, while a factor, would not necessarily be the biggest problem!
barmpot
LOTSW Fanatic
Brian Johns thanks for your comprehensive note about pilots. Quite encouraging. There is a parallel with railway drivers - they have to be passed on each type of locomotive or unit they drive as well as the route - so once again a very high regard for public safety. The point of the original thought I posted which sparked off this discussion, was that pilots arr careful people who can think through likely problems to avoid them becoming worse.