jokes bad or otherwise.

There is a new Bra called "Sheep Dog Bra"... Reason is because just like a sheep dog it rounds them up and points them in the right direction.............
 
There is a new Bra and it's called the "Sheep Dog Bra"..... Reason is that it rounds them up and points them in the right direction..
 
Prince Andrew has said he's had some ups and downs in the past year.
Wouldn't that have something to do with being the Duke of York?
 
“I wish I was a millionaire like my dad”
“Wow,your dad's a millionaire?”
“No but he wishes he was”
 
My boss said to me, "Do you think you can come in on Saturday this week? I know you enjoy your weekends, but I need you here."
"Yeah, no problem. I'll probably be late though as the public transport is bad on weekends."
"Okay, when do you think you'll get here then?"
"Monday."
 
My mate said “I found out a great way to keep men from dating my daughter.
Whenver one of them rings my doorbell and asks to see Angela, I'll say:
"Angela? You must be mistaken. There was an Angela living here once, but she's been dead for 25 years."
It gets them everytime.”
 
BREAKING NEWS- NASA are to launch a special shuttle mission to the international space station to repair the damage caused by Charlie Adam's penalty kick.
 
George said:
BREAKING NEWS- NASA are to launch a special shuttle mission to the international space station to repair the damage caused by Charlie Adam's penalty kick.
Click to expand...

Apparently it has just landed. On Jupiter.
 
My boss is so tight fisted.
If you come into work late, he docks your pay,
If you come into work early, he charges you rent.
 
I was saying to a stranger in the pub last night, "My granddad is 104 tomorrow."
“Wow! What's his secret?"
"He was born 104 years ago."
 
I was standing outside the off licence earlier when I stopped some bloke who was going in.
I said, "Excuse me mate, can you buy me some alcohol please?"
He looked at me and said, "You must be old enough, surely?"
"Yeah I am" I replied, "I just haven't got any money."
 
I rang a plumber from the Yellow Pages "John Brown, 24 hour Plumber"
He arrived and set to work.
20 minutes later my house was flooded!
'How long have you been a plumber?' I asked
'24 hours' he replied
 
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