jokes bad or otherwise.

Compo said:
Evidence is proving that you are not an animal lover. SHAME !! You can say bad jokes if you want but these come under the heading of Cruelty.. Hope I didn't ruin your day. But you certainly did for animal lovers..
Click to expand...

Putting it another way, let us not confuse bad taste with cruelty.
 
Well I am sorry if I offended anybody but same as everyone I am also entitled to my opinion.
 
On March 06, 2010,at 11:50:59 AM I put my first 'joke' on here.I have posted a joke almost everyday since.To be criticised twice in that time,I think,is pretty good going.
Let's not fall out over it.It was a joke some liked some didn't.
I'll be more careful in future
 
From now on I'm only going to buy that fancy water with healthy additives.
Like this one here. It's got hops, yeast and malted barley in it.
 
Some bloke knocked on my door today and said, "I have a parcel for your next door neighbour."
I said, "You've got the wrong house then mate."
 
George said:
On March 06, 2010,at 11:50:59 AM I put my first 'joke' on here.I have posted a joke almost everyday since.To be criticised twice in that time,I think,is pretty good going.
Let's not fall out over it.It was a joke some liked some didn't.
I'll be more careful in future
Click to expand...

geirge

there have been one or two I placed on here and was not sure - and there may have been one or two of yours I was less sure about - but

dick said:
... The heading does say " jokes bad or otherwise " for petes sake ???
Click to expand...

absolutely.
 
;) Why was the Essex girl pleased to finish the jigsaw after 18 months??

It said on the box 3 to 6 years :-[
 
The police arrived on the scene to find me upside down in my car.
They told me not to be so silly, and to sit properly.
 
My memory is SO bad I changed my password to "incorrect." That way when I enter the wrong one, it'll tell me, "Your password is incorrect."
 
A travelling salesman stopped alongside a fence on a country road to rest a few minutes.

A horse came to the fence and began to boast about his past. "Yes sir, I'm a fine horse. I've run in 25 races and won over £5 million. I keep my trophies in the barn."

The astonished salesman ran to find the horse's owner and offered a handsome sum for the animal.

"Oh, you don't want that horse," said the farmer.

"Yes I do," said the salesman, "and I'll give you £10,000 for him."

The farmer said without hesitation, "He's yours."

While he wrote out his cheque, the salesman asked, "By the way, why wouldn't I want your horse?"

"Because," said the farmer, "he's a liar - he hasn't won a race in his life."
 
When I was a child my mother said to me that I have to wear bright clothes so the cars could see me better.

So I went out with white shoes, white pants, a white jacket, white gloves, a white cap and was hit by a snow plough.
 
"Would you like anything on your chips?"
"Does it cost extra?"
"Ten pence."
"All right, I'll have four sausages and a steak pie."
 
My wife is REALLY angry with me.

Because I didn't know why she was angry with me in the first place..
 
??? Some bloke hit me over the head with a power tool.
Just stood minding my own business and then ....BOSCH!!! ;)
 
Laughing out loud over the Sausage and steak pie, and also BOSCH.
Very funny, lads, very, very funny.
 
barmpot said:
George said:
"Would you like anything on your chips?"
"Does it cost extra?"
"Ten pence."
"All right, I'll have four sausages and a steak pie."
Click to expand...

do not know why but this one just caused a great burst of laughter. keep 'em coming George!
Click to expand...


I am not a daring kind of person but I would love to try this out on an unexpected person. Love this joke George..
 
One I do not recall seeing before. and it's clean - well in one sense:

My wife sat down next to me as I was flipping channels.
She asked, "What's on TV?"
I said, "Dust."

And then the fight started...
 
George said:
"Would you like anything on your chips?"
"Does it cost extra?"
"Ten pence."
"All right, I'll have four sausages and a steak pie."
Click to expand...

Reminds me of one of my favourite and far from original lines:
"What would you like in your whisky?"
"More whisky!"
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top