jokes bad or otherwise.

[barmpot]

When chemists die, they barium.

 

[barmpot]

As a premed student at Washington University in St. Louis, I had to take a
difficult class in physics. One day our professor was discussing a
particularly complicated concept.

A student rudely interrupted to ask, "Why do we have to learn this stuff?"

"To save lives," the professor responded quickly and continued the lecture.

A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again, "So how does physics
save lives?" he persisted.

"It keeps the ignorant out of medical school," replied the professor

 

[barmpot]

How do you frustrate a T-Rex? Feed him finger food.

 

[barmpot]

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary?
A thesaurus.

 

[George]

Brian from accounts passed me this morning as I was going to work, he must have been doing at least 100mph.
Mind you, he did jump from the thirty-second floor

 

[dick]

Brian from accounts passed me this morning as I was going to work, he must have been doing at least 100mph.
Mind you, he did jump from the thirty-second floor

OUCH

 

[George]

Beecham's cold relief tablets are rubbish.
I've just eaten a whole packet and I'm still freezing.

 

[Big Unc]

Brian from accounts passed me this morning as I was going to work, he must have been doing at least 100mph.
Mind you, he did jump from the thirty-second floor

Heard to state, "So far, so good" as he passed the tenth floor.

 

[George]

Brian from accounts passed me this morning as I was going to work, he must have been doing at least 100mph.
Mind you, he did jump from the thirty-second floor

Heard to state, "So far, so good" as he passed the tenth floor.

Good one....I like that

 

[George]

If the male soul had calories, women would probably stop devouring them.

 

[George]

Try saying "Irish wrist watch"

 

[George]

Took a massive gamble at the Cheltenham festival yesterday.
I went to the burger van.

 

[George]

My neighbour's dog did his business on my lawn again.

He wasn't very happy when I took his laptop away.

 

[George]

Women.
They don't like it when you ask their age, but kill you if you forget their birthday.

 

[George]

I went train spotting once. It was really easy.
They're massive and make loads of noise.

 

[George]

My hat's just blown off and landed in some quicksand.......it hasn't sunk in yet

 

[George]

Even Eric Joyce admits that he is unlikely to be able to stand at the next general election.

 

[George]

Teacher: Now then class, let's do some simple sums. I give you a £10 and you take a £1. What do I have?

Little Johnny:: A bank account in Cyprus, Miss.

 

[George]

Woke up this morning and discovered a leak in my fish tank.
Well, it was either that or a very large spring onion.

 

[George]

I typed "Missing medieval servant" into Google but it came up with "Page not found".