jokes bad or otherwise.

Another mothers letter ...............My daughter could not attend school yesterday , she was "very ill"

PS I did not believe her either!:rolleyes:
 
A long joke for not the biggest laughs

Three Rabbits Foot, Foot Foot and Foot Foot Foot are on a green . Foot said to Foot Foot and Foot Foot Foot " You know I'm hungry and its lunchtime , the carrots in the next field must be big and delicious by now and would make a lovely dinner" .

Foot Foot said to Foot and Foot Foot Foot " I know but they are across the road"

Foot said to Foot Foot and Foot Foot Foot " Yes but if we follow the Green Cross code and look right , left and right again and we would be fine "

Foot Foot said to Foot and Foot Foot Foot " Well ok but we need to follow your directions Foot "

Foot Foot Foot said Foot and Foot Foot " I am happy with that"

So they set off , Foot looks right , left and right again hops out and splat he gets hit by a truck

Some time passes and Foot Foot and Foot Foot Foot are on the green .

Foot Foot says to Foot Foot Foot " you know those carrots they will be delicious I think we should go and get some for lunch"

Foot Foot Foot says to Foot Foot " We can't do that"

Foot Foot says to Foot Foot Foot " Why Not???"

Foot Foot Foot says to Foot Foot " Well we've already got One Foot in the Grave " :08:
 
Doctor, Doctor! I keep seeing what I shall be doing in 4 years time :39:

Don't worry, it means you've got 20/20 vision!!:08:
 
The editor of a small country newspaper, furious over several government bills that had recently been passed, printed a scathing editorial with an enormous headline:

"HALF THE LEGISLATORS ARE CROOKS."

Many local politicians were outraged and exerted tremendous pressure on him to print a retraction. He finally gave in to the pressure and ran his apology with the headline:

"HALF THE LEGISLATORS ARE NOT CROOKS."
 
Whats the difference between a good lawyer and a great one??

A good lawyer knows the law, a great lawyer knows the judge!!:08:
 
A boy is walking around the docks looking at the boats . An old sailor comes up behind him and says " thinking of going to see lad" , "yes " replies the boy . When he turns around he sees the man with a patch on his eye , a hook for a hand and a peg leg . " Excuse me sir but how did you get those injuries ?" Well I was diving for gold on the Spanish Main and a shark bit my leg off , then we were sailing around the Cape of Good Hope when we were boarded by Pirates and in the fight one of them cut off my hand" . " And what happened with your eye " asked the boy . " Well I was on shore and I heard a Seagull screeching, I looked up and it pooped in my eye " . " How can Gull poop cause you to lose your eye ? " asks the boy . " Well I only had the hook for a day" :08::08:
 
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